Connecting with PDA Kids: 3 Neuroaffirming Strategies That Actually Work
By Nicole Spartels | Neuro-Love-Notes
Are you raising, teaching, or supporting a PDA child—and feeling like the usual "behaviour management" strategies just don’t cut it?
Same. That’s why I made this.
This is not another clinical deep-dive or behaviour management manual. It’s a straight-talking, heart-led guide built from 20 years of teaching, my lived experience as an undiagnosed PDA kid, and what I’ve actually seen work when the goal is connection—not compliance.
Inside, I share my top 3 neuroaffirming strategies for connecting with PDA kids in a way that feels good (for both of you). These are tools that respect autonomy, reduce resistance, and build the kind of trust that makes everything else possible.
You’ll learn how to:
- Build safety through co-regulation (without controlling or bribing)
- Offer choice in a way that actually works (no sneaky tricks)
- See “behaviour” through a nervous system lens (and stop the shame cycle)
- Use play as a bridge—not a reward
If you’re tired of feeling stuck in power struggles… if your intuition says there’s another way to relate… this guide is for you.
It’s practical, personal, and packed with the stuff (no fluff) I wish every adult supporting PDA kids had in their back pocket.
Let’s stop trying to “fix” kids—and start building relationships that hold them.
✨ Instant PDF download
Perfect for:
- Parents & carers
- Teachers & educators
- Support workers & therapists
- Anyone raising or working with beautifully complex, autonomy-seeking kids
🎁 BONUS: Includes a playful fourth strategy that’s often the secret sauce—especially when nothing else seems to work.
🧠 Built on lived experience + deep attunement—not outdated systems.
💛 A resource to return to again and again when things feel hard.
Because these kids aren’t here to comply.
They’re here to connect.
Let’s meet them there.
🌈 Craving more neuroaffirming goodness?
Peek inside my Gumroad library for guides, tools, and resources to help you support neurodivergent kids—without the power struggles.
💞 Pricing Note:
This guide is priced at $8 USD to keep it accessible for as many people as possible. It is free to my paid Substack Subscribers.
Creating these offerings takes many hours of deep thought, reflection, and focus—they are my soul work and service.
As someone navigating the disabling impacts of Autism and ADHD, I don’t have the capacity to work full-time in traditional ways. If my work resonates with you and you feel called to offer more, you’re warmly invited to pay what feels aligned and supportive.
Your contributions help sustain this work—and allow me to keep creating real-talk, resourcing tools for neurodivergent folks doing the deep work of coming home to themselves.
Thank you for valuing this. And for valuing you.